Hemingbrough Church Parish Magazine

Black and White and read all over…

Of course the children’s joke – a newspaper. As we go into the summer I wanted to say thank you to those who prepare and distribute the magazine. It is a major commitment and it is much appreciated. The magazine is taken by some 200 households in the village and beyond and is a clear indication of the support the church gets from the wider community.

At this time of year GCSE papers dominate my study. A few years ago a previous examiner set the question, “’If Jesus was alive today he would have a website’. Do you agree?” One candidate answered the question really well and then proceeded to write a note to the marker to tell them that it was a daft question. I wonder.

In Jesus’ day his method of spreading the gospel was to tell stories, to argue with the other teachers and, most dramatically, through the miracles and the resurrection. This was all recorded in the Gospels. Each Gospel has it’s own characteristics and reflects the audience it was written for.

I am certain that Jesus would have web site now. I also wonder whether he would be a religious teacher or whether he would aim for status through the media. It all shows how important it is to get the message across.

I hope that through the efforts of those who prepare and distribute the magazine the Christian Gospel is communicated to those who read it. A gospel of hope and joy. Jesus came as a human being to share in our experiences and did right through to his death. We can share with each other in the community of the church and learn to see life as a gift of God and even face the end of life with true hope of resurrection. The magazine has its part to play in this.

Thank you to you all.


Fun Day 2008

After a glorious week of summer weather we found that Saturday 7th June dawned to a dull, overcast day with the promise of rain—just the day for our Fun Day!
However the promised rain turned out to be a few light showers early in the day as we were getting set up. Although the day was not blessed with the sunshine of last year we were able to continue outside.
A very busy day provided a magician entertaining the children, hot dogs and burgers barbecued by the church gate, even a bouncy castle and the opportunity to stone David Mc Sherry’s crows!
There were prize winners galore from the Tombola and the raffle and it was good to see the £100 first prize from the raffle go to a village resident.
At the end of the day we were left with £1100 towards the day to day expenses of the church.
Our grateful thanks go to all those who supported our efforts, both those attending to join in the fun and in particular our thanks go to the people who gave up their Saturday to help us raise the cash and also to provide a fun filled day, particularly for the children.

Progress Report on Heating

Representatives of the PCC met with the Diocesan Heating Adviser and there was a useful discussion about how we deal with heating the Church.
Because the chancel and the adjoining aisle are not part of any other plans it was agreed that we could proceed speedily with this part of the scheme as it will be on a separate heating circuit. Plans and specifications are now being drawn up so that we can apply for faculty permission and we are also in the process of applying for the gas supply.
Early in July we shall be meeting with a senior official of English Heritage, our architect and the Church Buildings Officer to discuss the next stage.

Church Services – July– August 2008

Sunday 6th July 7th Sunday after Trinity
St Andrew’s 10.30am Mattins
St Mary’s 9.00am Holy Communion
Sunday 13th July 8th Sunday after Trinity
St Andrew’s 9.00am Holy Communion
St Mary’s 10.30am Holy Communion
Sunday 20th July 9th Sunday after Trinity
St Andrew’s 9.00am Holy Communion
St Mary’s 10.30am Family Service
Sunday 27th July 10th Sunday after Trinity
St Andrew’s 9.00am Holy Communion
St Mary’s 10.30am Holy Communion
Sunday 3rd August 11th Sunday after Trinity
St Andrew’s 10.30am Holy Communion
St Mary’s 9.00am Holy Communion
Sunday 10th August 12th Sunday after Trinity
St Andrew’s 9.00am Holy Communion
St Mary’s 10.30am Holy Communion
Sunday 17th August 13th Sunday after Trinity
St Andrew’s 9.00am Holy Communion
St Mary’s 10.30am Family Service
Sunday 24th August 14th Sunday after Trinity
St Andrew’s 9.00am Holy Communion
St Mary’s 10.30am Holy Communion
Sunday 31st August 15th Sunday after Trinity
St Andrew’s 9.00am Holy Communion
St Mary’s 10.30am Holy Communion


One of the signs of summer is the return of the house martins swooping low over the roads and footpaths and returning to the nests that they left as autumn came last year.
Another sign is the growing number of visitors to St Mary’s and the last few weeks have been very busy,
On May 29th about 60 members of the Organists Club came. The Club is a national one and although most of the visitors were from London there were also members fro Hereford, Edinburgh and Newark. They were based in Hull and visiting Howden Minster and St George’s Minster in Doncaster.
They stayed for about 45 minutes and because f their tight schedule only a few were able to play the organ. They expressed their delight, one lady remarking to a friend that she did not know that Yorkshire had such fine church buildings.
We have also been hosts to a group of bellringers from the south east; they were touring the area for three days and had a similar tight schedule. They intended to stay for 45 minutes, but this soon became almost double as they explored the church and all took their turns on the bells.
Both of these groups also left generous donations as an expression of their thanks and interest.
Wednesday morning is also busy since we resumed Open House. Many people drop in for a chat and a coffee, some regularly cycle from Goole to see us and have a chat. Open House is slowly becoming a meeting point and has the potential to be a valuable asset to the community. Isn’t it time that you looked in and joined us for a coffee? You will be made most welcome and the coffee is free!

July 22nd St Mary Magdalene

It is easy to understand the popularity of Mary Magdalene over the centuries: she is the patron saint both of repentant sinners and of the contemplative life. Jesus drove seven demons from Mary, who came from near Tiberias in Galilee. She became his follower to the bitter end. She followed him to Jerusalem and was present during the crucifixion, standing heart-broken at the foot of the cross. Her love for Jesus did not end there, for she went to the tomb to anoint his body on the Sunday morning.

Such faithful, humble devotion was richly repaid: it gave her a unique privilege among all mankind: she was the first person to whom the Risen Lord appeared on Easter Sunday morning. She thought He was the gardener at first.

Mary Magdalen has sometimes been identified with the woman who anointed Christ’s feet in the house of Simon (Lk 7.37). Over the centuries many artists have painted this scene. Mary Magdalene’s feast has been kept in the West since the 8th century. England has 187 ancient churches dedicated to her, as well as a College in both Oxford and Cambridge.

In the opening of scripture And the breaking of the bread,
In the nail marks And the wound in his side,
In the miraculous catch and fish breakfast on the beach
They recognized him.

But for me,
My Lord said, “Mary.”
Daphne Kitching

Why misery loves shopping

The July sales are upon us, and it seems that the more unhappy we are, the more we will want to spend. or now psychologists have ‘officially’ discovered what most women have known for years: shopping cheers you up.

Research has found that those of us who are depressed will be willing to spend almost three times as much on a product as those of us who are content. Psychologists reckon that this is because people who are sad feel they are worthless – and value products more.

It was also found that people with a high sense of self-focus pay more than those with a low self-focus. “Presumably they want to enhance their sense of self,” says one researcher.

Sport has the power to change the world
- Nelson Mandela

Sunday 22nd June saw St Mary’s welcome a party of young people from Tanzania together with members of their host families in this country. They were from The Filbert Bayi School in Dar-es-Salaam which has links with Barlby High School through the British Council’s Dreams and Teams Programme.

The Schools’ links are fostered by the British Council for specialist sports colleges to encourage international links. Filbert Bayi was an international athlete and a world record holder for the 1500 metres in 1974 and the mile in 1975, he is the founder and owner of the school. The School is one of the top performing schools in Tanzania and has about 500 students. There is a primary school in Dar and the secondary school is in new buildings about 20 km outside. The school takes both day pupils and boarders.

This was the second visit by students and staff from Tanzania. In January a party of students from Barlby went to Tanzania and a further party will go next January. They stay in a hostel where they have to carry their own water!

The Dreams and Teams initiative aims to develop young leaders and citizen skills and is an enriching experience for all, both young people from Africa seeing the UK and English students experiencing something of the life of Africa. The young people were a delight and took a full part in the service including singing (with the actions!) two worship songs from their own country. We were pleased to welcome them and look forward to the next visit.

2.30PM St Mary’s Church
Bring along your pet dog and see who has the
waggiest tail, is the best groomed and also several other classes all with prizes. There will also be a prize for a Fancy Dress Class. Judged by a staff member from Hearing Dogs for the deaf.
Refreshments Available


Our next meeting will be on Monday 28th July, 7.30pm at St Andrew’s Church, Cliffe. For this meeting we shall have the pleasure of welcoming Stewart Skilbeck who will give a talk entitled “That’s your lot!” This is of course about Stewart’s experiences over the years working for Bonhams Auctioneers where he specialises in cars—but not just any old cars!This is an open meeting and that means that the ladies of the Monday Group are prepared to allow men to attend for this special occasion.

There will be no meeting in August. The September meeting will be Monday 29th at 7.30pm

Our donation from Hemingbrough went to Christian Aid who responded to the disaster through their partners by providing food, water purification tablets, medicines and shelter.
Christian Aid will continue to provide support and will place emphasis on implementation of improved disaster preparedness. Disaster risk reduction projects are vital in helping communities vulnerable to cyclones and other disasters know what action to take and how to recover more quickly.

Further to my diary last month I am pleased to say that all my family survived although the houses of those in the Delta villages were destroyed. I heard on the 13th June that my cousin with 6 children had almost rebuilt his home. He was managing to get to Rangoon, although this was still not an easy journey, and so was able to buy essential provisions with the help of guardians. He had not seen any foreign aid arrive in his area although he was aware that it had been given by many nations and would eventually get to them. As a family they will work together to ensure that they can carry on living albeit on a shoestring. Their livelihood is in the rice fields which were destroyed but they will gradually get these back and rebuild their lives.
I wonder how many one of us would have coped in such a situation. Maybe when you know that if you don't make every effort yourself to sort the situation rather than rightly or wrongly expecting help from others it does focus you more.
Even though their plight is out of the daily news we must not forget them, especially the children who have been left orphaned, so please continue to help through the agencies that are always located in the country. Agencies such as Save the Children have been in the country many years and are able to move freely within the communities.
How to fight those rising prices

Petrol prices soaring, food prices up, and education costs spiralling out of sight... while incomes are growing at the slowest rate for a quarter of a century.

No wonder we are all feeling the pinch. So here are ten ways to save some money:

1. Switch to supermarket own brands... it could reduce your bills by a third over four months.
2. Buy your fruit and veg at your local market... where prices are about 30 per cent cheaper than a supermarket.
3. Switch off your TV set at night, and lights when you leave a room. You could cut your electricity bill by 19 per cent.
4. Go shopping for food after 7pm, when you will find that perishable goods are cut by as much as 70 per cent. Buy them – and freeze them until needed.
5. Beware expensive branded medication. For example, own brand paracetamol costs 39p, as opposed to the cheapest branded alternative – at £1.59.
6. Change all your light bulbs to energy-efficient ones. Each one reduces your electricity by £7 over a year. So ten bulbs could save you £20 in four months.
7. Only EVER boil as much water in the kettle as you will need. Kettles use a large amount of electricity.
8. Never buy your favourite magazine off the shelf. Take out a subscription – and save up to 80%!
9. Cancel your credit card’s payment protection plan, and take out cheaper protection, which you can find on paymentcentre.co.uk
10. Keep your tyres properly inflated. Lower tyre pressure means higher petrol consumption.

Requesting articles for publication in our magazine means that we never know what will turn up. Where this letter came from we do not really know, but it does provide an insight into an alternative parish life!

The Rectory
St. James the Least
My dear Nephew Darren

The estimate for re-hanging the bells in our church tower came as something of a shock. The church council discussed fund-raising at length. Someone suggested selling part of the Rectory garden for building, another for getting 200 parishioners to loan £1,000 each, interest-free. Mrs Ffrench suggested holding a jumble sale. The jumble sale won – mainly because it gives everyone an opportunity to see what their neighbours think of as junk.

Expensive articles are brought with an ostentatious show of modesty when everyone is together, sorting donations. Genuine rubbish, such as black and white televisions that broke 20 years ago and cardigans with holes at the elbows are left at the church hall doors in the dead of night.

Before the doors opened, all the helpers were assembled behind piles of clothing, which had they collapsed would have smothered half the congregation. I was unable to see little Miss Faversham, who rarely misses these opportunities to kit herself out with another year’s wardrobe. Someone pointed to one table and told me she was in men’s clothing. I always had my suspicions.

Once the doors were opened and customers poured in, I got a better appreciation of how the Italians must have felt when they saw Hannibal with his elephants pouring down the sides of the Alps. That is when the mettle of our ladies really shows, haggling over whether something worth £10 goes for 10 or 11p. Those used to riding with hounds seem best able to control the crowds – even if they occasionally tend to regard the customers as the fox.
As it happened, the youth club were going pot-holing that day, so most of the teenagers bought complete sets of clothing for 10p which could then be discarded afterwards. I wondered what their caving instructor would think of teenagers arriving dressed in dinner jackets and tweed skirts.

Two days of preparation leads to a battle that is over in less than an hour and we emerge bloodied but unbowed, home for a bath, in the knowledge that the first step to saving the bells has been taken. Only another 2,500 jumble sales and we shall have reached our target. The day was slightly marred when I crossed the church hall car park to see a note stuck on to my car: “Sold – to be collected later”.

Your loving uncle,


Sunday 18th May:
Ethan Michael Leetham of Annesley
Sinday 25th May:
Lewis James Wilkinson of Hemingbrough
Annabel Samantha Varley of Hemingbrough
Saturday 31st May
Martyn James Hall and Kelly Ann Harrand both of South Duffield
Saturday 6th June
Adam John Harvey of Thorpe Willoughby and Laura May Roper of Cliffe
Monday 16th June
Guilio Muzzioli of Hemingbrough Aged 87 years


I know God loves everybody but then he never met my sister.

Are there any devils on earth? I think there may be one in my class.